Saturday, June 30, 2012

Tom not so cruisey

"Divorce? Hahahaha! I'm still married to Xenu."

As soon as the manic movie star began to date Katie Holmes it became evident that their relationship was doomed for failure. Cruise and his bizzare behaviour like jumping on Oprahs couch or claiming he wanted to eat Katie Holmes' placenta were the centrepiece of an erratic and bizzare period in both Katie and Toms life. Scientology was the front of the wacky Top Gun star, but he found himself in the danger zone many times throughout his relationship.

What's next for Tom? Perhaps a Jonestown massacre where he runs around claiming the end of the world is nigh and kills all his former co-stars.

As for Katie Holmes, she better hope to hell she keeps a hold on Suri. The last thing that girl needs is a highly impressionable father with mental problems vindicating himself on her achievements. The man got a gold statue of her first shit, for crying out loud. Don't believe me? Look it up.

Lets hope for mankinds sake he doesn't continue procreating. The war of the worlds would be in the works for sure.

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